I made a very difficult call today. I withdrew my name from consideration in a search for a job that seemed, on paper, to be the perfect fit for me. But let me back up a minute.
About six months ago, I decided to pursue life outside of academia and go back to the “real” world. I began to wrap up client projects, complete contracts and stopped doing business development in anticipation of discontinuing my consulting work. I told my department chair and even talked to a lot of my students about it.
A lot of things led to this decision. The frustration of balancing school, consulting and mommyhood mounted and I decided that I couldn’t keep it up and keep my sanity. A couple of difficult clients (one that decided they didn’t want to pay their bill) helped push me over the edge.
I’ve applied for probably a dozen jobs. The job market for senior level folks in this neck of the woods is less than ideal – particularly for in-house positions. I assumed I’d have to move to Portland and was even considering Las Vegas (where my parents live).
Ups and downs, cover letter after cover letter I have been at it very steadily for about 3 months.
Then the fall teaching schedule began to circulate among the department. My heart sank. How could I give up teaching? I love it! Love, love, love it! At that point, I began bartering with myself… maybe I could still teach a class a term… maybe this or maybe that.
Last night, I literally had an epiphany. It was the middle of the night, the toddler had decided that sleeping next to mom was the way to go, and I was wide awake.
And that’s when I decided that I had to make the call.
I followed my heart. I love my students, I love my department, I love consulting (for all it’s ebbs and flows), I love Eugene and… I love my family. And despite long hours and sometimes endless days, I can always be there for my son and my significant other. Always.
I’ll post more soon about lessons learned and some things I’ve taken away from this process to bring myself back to center and feel excited about the possibilities going forward.
Comments
15 responses to “Following Your Heart… And Other Lessons Learned in a Job Search”
Kelli,
That must have been a tough decision to make. Eugene is great, U of O is great, but sometimes it can be tough to live a comfortable (and sane!) life.
I think I can speak for all of your students by saying that if you left, you’d be greatly missed. The J-school needs more professors like you, who challenge students and also make courses fun.
So glad you’re staying. 🙂
Hooray! I am thrilled you are staying, Kelli. It just wouldn’t be the same without you. I feel like singing “We Got Annie” (from the musical and movie, of course) and singing over it, “We got Kelli”! This is a good day for the University of Oregon and for me too!
Kelli! You are an amazing teacher, and I am so glad to hear that you are going to continue teaching. Life is too short to not do what you love and what makes you happy.
Cheers!
Ali
If following your heart has led to this decision then I couldn’t be happier for you. The PR sequence would be have been a much different experience for me without you. The PR curriculum needs you and your fresh teaching style, innovative ideas, and realistic expectations of your students. Never have I been more treated like a professional (i.e. you never repeat when assignments are due—who’s boss would actually do that??) or prouder of work I’ve completed because, well, your assignments were VERY HARD but you gave us the tools to do them VERY WELL. I can’t imagine students missing out on not only your social media assignments, but the rest of the term’s work as well. If only the PR faculty knew how many students are bitter they couldn’t go through your class. I’m so happy for you and UO that you’ve decided this way. And, well, if come a year you decide OK now you really have had enough, then at least another years worth of students were able to learn what real presentation slides are. Congratulations, Kelli! That epiphany moment—I just had one two weeks ago—is about equivalent to someone lifting 50 lbs off your shoulders and that month-long headache deciding it will go away…at least for me =) Congratulations.
Oh my gosh!
I wanted to share this decision because I know that a lot of my students and readers were aware of my job search. But what I got back (as you can see) is completely humbling and a little overwhelming.
And, of course, it confirms my decision many times over.
@lindsey: you’re right on. I had to decide what “sane” meant.
@tiffany: as long as you don’t sing the Kelly, Kelly, Kelly song from Cheers. That’s the one I get most often 🙂
@Ali: Thank you!
@Lisa: Yes! It’s a huge weight. It was a tough phone call to make, but I feel really good about my decision. And obviously comments like these help! Thank you so much.
Congratulations, friend! What a relief this must be.
Kelli,
I’ll go ahead and reiterate what your students and Tiffany have mentioned and say, how relieved I am to hear you are staying. I’m a true believer that everything happens for a reason and more often than not, we find that timing is essential. I think your heart has always been in teaching and consulting, but maybe you needed that time to step away from it and gain a second, outside perspective. It may have been the reality check you needed to realize that this is what makes you the happiest. You often wonder if something can make you happier or if there are other things you should be doing. It’s most comforting when you step away and examine your life and realize how happy you really are. These last 6 months must have been emotionally draining, but I think you’ll continue what you were doing but now with reassurance and a fresh mindset. Thanks for sharing your story with us. I assume that we in one point in our lives will have to take a step back and really evaluate our lives and career paths. If I’m ever in that position, I’ll think of you and remember that in the end, it will all be okay 🙂
I apologize for being somewhat Dr. Phil here, but It was what I was feeling at the moment! Heck, I decided to follow my heart.
I know most of us will be graduating in the spring, but maybe we can all agree to participate in an online class taught by you. It’ll be a social media approach. What do you think ? 🙂
@jessica That would be terrific! I would love to do that. And thanks for your comment – that was my original purpose… to give a somewhat different view than most students have right now of making career decisions. But like I said earlier, the comments have been overwhelming and humbling.
K,
I am so glad that you’re staying. Students and all those you’ve mentored, including me, need you to be a teacher. You bring so much to the PR sequence, you make it fresh, fun, always incorporate new ideas, and challenge students. And your model is now being replicated in other places–I would never have gotten my job if I hadn’t learned to be the teacher that I am from you. I can only pray that OU someday appreciates your value and pays/treats you accordingly, but in the meantime know that all of us value you SO much!
Michelle,
The teaching and mentoring is what I love, that’s for sure. And I’m thrilled that you’re able to use even a few of my ideas. Of course, I have had generous and creative mentors, too. Luckily for all of us!
Now we just need to write our book so I can become an in-demand speaker and consultant. 🙂
Isn’t job searching the worst? 🙂
I still don’t know how you do it all, I remember wondering how you managed to find time to keep up with all the social media-ing you do (not to mention the teaching, working, mothering, etc). You’re one of the only teachers I had who is still actively involved in helping me in the job search, and how you manage to pay attention to the little details like that boggles my mind. I’m glad you’re staying at UO because you’re more than just a good teacher; the fact that you stay actively involved in your students’ lives is super awesome and thanks so much for continuing to help me on my search. Good luck!
Glad to hear that you are staying with teaching, Kelli! I really feel like you were instrumental in expanding my interest in PR and especially social media – which has sparked my professional career. I know that you were an advocate for me and all of the other students that you teach. They are lucky to have you at U of O!
Alyssa & Stu: Thanks so much! It’s fun to know you’re still reading my blog, too!
It’s gratifying to know that my reasons for teaching are the reasons that you all appreciate me. I have to say… this has been a great day.
Kelli, now I see why you were SO excited and happy! What a nice way to have people cheer you up and say thanks. With the little I know you as a teacher, I am glad you’re staying as not all professors love what they do 🙂 SO NICE to know some more students will get the benefit of having you around! Warm regards. Itzel
Kelli,
This is such great news! The PR department is so lucky to have you. We all feel so lucky to have you for Campaigns, and I know that many more students will now be able to benefit from your experiences.
Congrats!
Jonathan